I think I'm coming to terms with the fact that I do have OCD. I would say it's mild since it doesn't run my life, nonetheless it's there. I'm not one to 'self-diagnose' but all the signs are there and then some.

Now I know what you're picturing. She's washing her hands a lot and turning on and off the lights and checking the stove every 10 minutes 'just to be sure....'. Nah, not me. I'm on the other side.
I've been reading this site for a while, haven't posted on it because I feel that reading all the other posts by others with my same OCD is enough satisfaction for me. I love this site. I probably would be a person that would post on it, but I don't have time and I really don't want to fit in with those freaks.

My OCD is pretty specialized. I am a CSP. For those not in the know that's a Compulsive Skin Picker. In other words, I LOVE to pick zits. I know a lot of people attack their unwanted friends probably as a daily ritual. I go just a bit further than that. I like to pick my husbands (he really doesn't have any, but if I see one possible 'blemish' I'm all over it). He commented to me tonite actually that he could go on 'roids so he'd have a crop of them for me on a daily basis. Heh. THATS LOVE FOLKS. I'm also a nail biter, which does go along with CSP. I wear falsies to cover my bad habits. Now CSP doesn't just stop at zits, it includes cuticles, scabs, any bumps of anykind actually. For me it's not a duty to pop, it's satisfaction and a feeling of relief and accomplishment. Strange? Yes, but hey, I love my runners high. And to top it off, if I don't have anything to pick then I am a derma-surfer. Yes, I surf the net for dermatology comedomes and pustules to find the worst of the worst and stare at what I do not have. Not that I'd want horrible acne, boils, pustules, cysts and other popable bumpies. But I don't 'mind' browsing dermatologist sites that expose these ailments on the World Wide Web for my eager eyes.

Being a CSP, I do not feel the way most bad OCD persons feel. I don't feel lonely and seclude myself in a silent jail. I pick and move forward. I do not injure myself, pick for several hours a day, require hospitalizing because I've picked myself a horrible infection. This site is a brief overview of CSP. I don't know if my OCD stems from a chemical imbalance, or if I'm just a creature of a really bad habit. I've had acne all my life. When I entered Junior High, I had it all over my back, chest and face. The acne on my body was rather painful (I'm referring to the physical feeling rather than the emotional). Although emotionally, I was self conscious. I remained popular in school despite my acne. I've been in and out of dermatologist since I was twelve. In my twenties my acne went away but in my 30s it came back. Since adulthood I've only had facial acne and it was nothing like it was as a child. Now, it's more 'annoying' than painful because I've longed for clear skin and this childhood 'disease' is keeping up with me. When I was pregnant my skin was never clearer. I actually thought my acne was gone, but a few months after I gave birth, it slowly came back.

I've been on the same medical 'regime' for years now. I use 2 medications (topical) daily, everyday, probably for the rest of my life. I still get the occasional blemish. I find this unsatisfying. My cuticles are paying the price for my clear skin.

Before you say "Hmmmmmm..." and shake you head at me ready to judge, realize this. We see fat people, anorexic people, compulsive & obsessive people, nail biters, skin pickers, hair pullers, emotionally weak or stressed out people, uncooperative people, alcoholics, smokers, poor performers, shy people, those who appear lazy & tend to sleep-walk through the day. We see people with latent talent who refuse to be motivated. We see frightened people, some who can't leave their homes & others who simply can't stand up & make a presentation at work. This is just a short list of what we can see if we bother to look. The list goes on and on for emotional disorders, but I'm only #4 and #5 on this list. How many are you?

c-
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Tags: OCD, CSP, zits, blemishes

Ok. So, I thought in this great country of the United States of America we have this thing called Freedom of Speech. Now I'm not one of those overly outspoken bots that go off on a tangent about something really political to prove a point. Ok, I did once or twice, but it was completely in line to the situation. Anyways, I'm the type that usually keeps comments to oneself. I'd call myself an observer rather than a pathmaker. I don't like to rustle up anyones feathers, I don't like to speak out of turn (unless it's to the Pants and I am determined to win the conversation point), actually, I don't like to publicly speak about anything. I'm DEFINATELY not the class clown, I'm much too reserved to be an actress. In saying this, I must turn around and say something completely negating what I just said.

I am the President of MOMS Club® in our local town. I got appointed to this position for one, because I sort of said I would because the person that was 'begged' to do it was just having a new baby; two, she was pretty new in our area and didn't know much-a-do around the Mound/Orono area; three, she in turn promised to be secretary if I were to be President (so, I wasn't completely letting her off the hook in not being on the board of directors of the club, I still wanted her to do something since I became friends with her and was going to take this duty off her hands).

As of next month I will no longer be President. I've paid my dues of being on the board for one year and it's now time for other members to step up and run this Hitler-like run club. The starting 'mothers' of this club had really good intentions when they formed this club and spread it's concept to other communities for other moms to use it as a guide to start and run their club with some sort of standard and organization. I honestly find the club helpful for people that decide to stay home and quit their career to raise children. It's a hard commitment to deal for hours on end with a young little one that has no logical sense at all, for years! I would say at this point in my life, going to work and dropping off my little Sofiedove would be easier because I could talk to people my size, have one decent conversation, eat a whole lunch meal wo/it getting cold, shared, tossed on me and then deciding that the damn meal wasn't even worth attempting to eat so just tossing it in the garabage a quarter eaten. Wearing a shirt for more than 2 hours wo/ getting a booger on it would be nice. But, I made a conscious decision to stay home and I'm enjoying the benefits (although I can't think of any right now, heh) but I still think going to work would be easier. Now, I'm not definately saying that working people have it easier. I'm sure getting up an hour earlier to get the kid ready, drop off at daycare then fighting traffic, then coming home, tired and spent from a long day at work and trying to keep up with a toddler would be easy. I'm sure it's not. Kids aren't easy no matter what the situation. But we love a challange right?

So, being President, I have to write a monthly newsletter and enclose a monthly calendar of events that is planned by our board. I'd say the task is easy and doesn't take up much of my time. In my newsletter I pick a topic to write about and put it to print. I don't put alot into it, I just 'free write' do a quick spell check and send it to the printers. I know some clubs do alot of research and thinking into what they write, I don't.

Last month I did a little flick on Mothers and Statistics. I love stats so I thought others would dig it too. I've had no complaints on what was published. Let me re-edit what I just said, I had no complaints by MY CLUB members about what was published. Apparently the "Minnesota Administration person" had a problem with my commentary that went along with one of the stats I published. Here's what was said.

Dear Christine,

Thank you so much for sending me your chapter's May 2006 newsletter. I spent
some time over the weekend reviewing the stack that I have accumulated this
month, and I was rather alarmed by a statement in the article on the first page
of the Orono/Westonka newsletter. "3 - Average number of children that women
in Utah and Alaska can expect to have in their lifetime. Hmmm, I wonder if it's
the Mormonism or the BIGOMY! As for Alaska, well it's just cold up there." I am sure that you meant no offense, but I urge you to consider the possibility that there are some who may find some of your commentary very insulting. I am not a member of the LDS church or the Mormon sect, but I don't believe that this type of comment is appropriate material for a MOMS Club newsletter. I strongly encourage you to issue an apology to your chapter members in the next chapter newsletter.

Now at first I thought, Stick it up yours! But I recanted. She's entitled to her opinion. As you can see, in my statment, I wasn't saying Mormonism=Bigomy. Nor the other way around. Utah is highly known for both of these contraversal state characteristics. I know that practicing Orthodox Catholics do not use birth control therefore their probability of getting pregnant is more than a birthcontrol using Lutheran. I was just trying to be entertaining while trying to educate. Numbers aren't normally fun, so all I was doing was funning them up some.

Poking fun of religion goes back as far back as when the written word was recorded. Satire and humor was always directed around religion and politics. If we can't make light of real life and the world we live in, then nothing would be funny. South Park wouldn't be on the air. TV would have no purpose.

What's so special about "faith" that puts it outside of the realm of ridicule? Is it OK to make fun of people because they're stupid, but it's not OK to make fun of them because they do things based on irrational religious beliefs? In other words, doing something irrational is fodder for humor; believing something that's irrational isn't. Is making fun of a Morman different to making fun of a Catholic? I wonder what would have happened if I made fun a Lutheran in the newsletter. Would I have even been questioned? Was I 'repremanded' because the religion I picked on was one that isn't as populus or established in this region. I'm sure the LDS Church finds that Catholics have irrational behaviors and Lutherans aren't believers at all because they sometimes don't even attend church.

And what's the difference between established religions and a group such as Heaven's Gate? Nothing, really. They all share irrational beliefs, they all have faith that what they believe is true, and they're all really just looking for a way to live forever. Maybe the only difference is how they were indoctrinated. But isn't that true about all religions? We all can say something is creepy about some religion.

Help me out here. I'm trying to figure out why some topics are met with almost complete agreement, while others cause some people to become defensive or uncomfortable.

I've come to the conclusion that it's perfectly acceptable to poke fun at people -- as long as it doesn't involve religious beliefs or the MOMS Club® because that would be super sacrilegious.

I realize that this blog post won't change the mind of a single person who reads it. But alas, I will continue to ridicule any religion every chance I get. Sorry, but that's how God created me.
c-
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Tags: MOMS Club, religion, Mormons, Catholics, Lutherans, Heaven's Gate, Satire, humor, God, Bigomy, South Park

Since my blog isn't one that is in the top 100 or 1,000, or 10,000, I haven't had a full email box asking where my whereabouts are! Eh, it is nice to be a nobody. I have had no sense of urgancy to fill my blog with stuff while my life plate has been a bit full as of late. The 2 readers I do have may have noticed I haven't been around (ty Jason whom lives with me, and ms.mamma who doesn't live with me). I looked at my blog tonite and almost forgot what it looked like. I have reasons though....

1. Mad knitting season. I'm trying to finish one project (Sofie's Rowan Sweater, Hannah) and I've started a new one (Schaefer Yarn, Elaine in the color Tink). This hobby isn't cheap by any means and when it sits stalemate for a while I feel guilty and an overwhelming urge to finish it before Sofie outgrows the wonderfulness of the warm goodness of a homemade sweater from her Mommy. When I attack a project my usual S.O.P is to: look at picture, copy picture, feel warm and fuzzy inside when project mirrors object exactly!
2. I had some relatives in town staying here and well, that usually throws me off schedule a bit.
3. I was a bit sick. I first came down with a cough thing that kept me up at night. Then I started dosing nyquil and falling asleep by 9:30pm. Then I got pink eye on top of it. Boy, talk about childhood diseases. It was exactly how I remembered it. Gooey redness sticky. Eh. Well, after 2 bottles of nyquil (for my cough not my eye), I think I'm doing better. I was sorta complaining about it all when a friend said, "well, could be worse. You could have crabs." She's right. I'll shuddup about it now.
4. Hmmm, OH. I've started working out. I can only do it at night. After 9:00pm. Luckly for me, it's one of those 24/7 clubs. I like to spend 'family time' when the Pants gets home. I do this by spending time with both Pants and the ankle biter, hence family time. So that's why I opt to work out after she goes to bed.
5. I've been working on getting a new admin board for our local MOMS Club® (if I don't write it like that, they'll come hunt me down and have me subpoenaed). I've been rather successful so I'm glad that my time as President is coming to a close. My next post will highlight the newest complaint from the MOMS Club® Administration to me. I tell ya, they always have something to gripe about and it seems that the Minnesota Administration really has their heads buried deep in the sand. Freedom of speech is a definate no no espically if having a little fun while poking fun of Religion. It's Religion. Who doens't poke a little fun at that! Sheesh. Lighten up women. Lighten up.
6. Stanley Cup playoffs. Dallas is out (yippie!)
   
7. Stanley Cup playoffs. Detroit is out as of tonite (doubleyippie!)
   
8. Stanley Cup playoffs. Calgary is 3-2 game in progress.
   
9. What else is there. Nothing, that's what.
10. Tag.. your it!

c-
:))
Tags: knitting, MOMS Club, nyquil, Stanley Cup, pink eye, hockey